Queer-affirmative relationship coaching for people in NYC.
Online coaching for queer, trans, non-binary, and LGBTQIA+ clients across NYC and the surrounding region. Affirmative practice, real toolkit, no surprise.
Online · Sliding scale · Pay-as-you-go
The toolkit, applied here.
Queer relationship coaching with me in NYC is grounded in lived community experience and an explicitly affirmative stance. The toolkit is the same one I use across the practice: Embodied Consent, parts-aware coaching, somatic tracking, the EPIC Communication Model. What's specific to queer relational work is the additional layers: internalized cultural messaging, family-of-origin patterns, the long history of having to translate yourself for survival, and the somatic cost that takes. We work present-focused on what you actually want now.
A few common reasons people in NYC write to me.
- Queer couples or individuals working on relational patterns that conventional advice misses
- Trans or non-binary clients wanting an affirmative coach who actually knows the territory
- Queer + non-monogamous (the overlap is real and specific)
- Partners with mixed-orientation or mixed-identity dynamics
- Long-term queer partnerships looking for a way to deepen intimacy that has gone routine
A note on the local scene.
New York City has a massive, densely-layered CNM/kink/queer ecosystem that rewards specificity. Brooklyn, Bushwick especially, has been the visible polyamorous and queer-kink center for the last decade. The Manhattan scene differs sharply: more professional, more discreet, more financial-services-adjacent CNM. The Hudson Valley has its own distinct queer-poly cluster with a contemplative practitioner overlap. NYC's pace asks specific questions about how relational work survives the workweek.
Local references and resources
- Open Love NY (NYC poly community, founded 2009)
- NY/NJ Polyamory Meetup
- Omega Institute (Hudson Valley contemplative center)
- Garrison Institute (Hudson Valley contemplative training)
- Bushwick queer-and-poly nightlife
- Manhattan kink-affirmative therapist and practitioner community
Coaching is online; New York residents can work with Kate as a coach. For psychotherapy in New York, look for a New York-licensed therapist or psychologist. Kate's therapy practice is California-only.
- FREQUENTLY ASKED
Quick answers.
01Are you actually queer-affirmative?
I have spent over twenty years inside queer and CNM communities, professionally and personally. My practice is openly trans-affirmative, kink-affirmative, and CNM-affirmative. I co-host a podcast (Open Deeply with Sunny Megatron) where these communities are the explicit subject.
If you want to vet that for yourself, the podcast is the most public window into how I think.
02Why work with someone outside NYC when there are local queer-affirmative coaches?
There are excellent queer-affirmative coaches in NYC. The decision about whether to work with someone local versus online is yours, and I will not pretend my online practice is automatically better than a strong local fit.
What I bring specifically: clinical depth (23 years), published frameworks, lived experience inside CNM/kink/queer communities, and a practitioner style that pulls from a deep toolbox rather than a single modality. If that style fits what you want, online is fine. If you want a coach you can sometimes see in person, that is a different choice and both are valid.
03I'm trans or non-binary. Are we likely to be a good fit?
Often, yes.
Many trans and non-binary clients work with me around relationships, non-monogamy, communication, sexuality, dating, self-trust, life transitions, and creating a life that feels more aligned with who they are.
You won't need to explain basic gender concepts, justify your identity, or spend our time educating me.
I'm affirming, but I'm not a specialist in medical transition, surgeries, transition-related advocacy, or gender assessment work. If those are the primary reasons you're seeking support, I'll gladly help point you toward practitioners whose expertise is centered in those areas.
If you're looking for coaching around relationships, intimacy, communication, non-monogamy, or personal growth, there's a good chance we'll work well together.
The first conversation is free.
Online consultation, up to 50 minutes. We talk about what you're working on, how I work, and find a rate that works for both of us.
Schedule a free coaching consult →