Queer-affirmative relationship coaching for people in Portland.
Online coaching for queer, trans, non-binary, and LGBTQIA+ clients across Portland and the surrounding region. Affirmative practice, real toolkit, no surprise.
Online · Sliding scale · Pay-as-you-go
The toolkit, applied here.
Queer relationship coaching with me in Portland is grounded in lived community experience and an explicitly affirmative stance. The toolkit is the same one I use across the practice: Embodied Consent, parts-aware coaching, somatic tracking, the EPIC Communication Model. What's specific to queer relational work is the additional layers: internalized cultural messaging, family-of-origin patterns, the long history of having to translate yourself for survival, and the somatic cost that takes. We work present-focused on what you actually want now.
A few common reasons people in Portland write to me.
- Queer couples or individuals working on relational patterns that conventional advice misses
- Trans or non-binary clients wanting an affirmative coach who actually knows the territory
- Queer + non-monogamous (the overlap is real and specific)
- Partners with mixed-orientation or mixed-identity dynamics
- Long-term queer partnerships looking for a way to deepen intimacy that has gone routine
A note on the local scene.
Portland has, per capita, arguably the most active polyamorous and kink-affirmative culture in the country. The Sex Positive Portland network, SPEEC, and a long tail of community spaces have made non-monogamy normalized in much of the city's social fabric. The queer/trans community in Portland overlaps deeply with poly community, and there's a strong somatic / contemplative practitioner base, sex-positive Buddhism, Hakomi, body-focused training programs, that influences how people in Portland do relational work.
Local references and resources
- Sex Positive Portland
- SPEEC (Sex-Positive Education and Exploration Center)
- Portland Shibari Salon
- The Sanctuary (PDX)
- The local kink-affirmative therapist and practitioner community
Coaching is online, so Oregon residents can work with Kate as a coach without a licensure question. For psychotherapy specifically, look for an Oregon-licensed therapist; Kate's therapy practice is California-only.
- FREQUENTLY ASKED
Quick answers.
01Are you actually queer-affirmative?
I have spent over twenty years inside queer and CNM communities, professionally and personally. My practice is openly trans-affirmative, kink-affirmative, and CNM-affirmative. I co-host a podcast (Open Deeply with Sunny Megatron) where these communities are the explicit subject.
If you want to vet that for yourself, the podcast is the most public window into how I think.
02Why work with someone outside Portland when there are local queer-affirmative coaches?
There are excellent queer-affirmative coaches in Portland. The decision about whether to work with someone local versus online is yours, and I will not pretend my online practice is automatically better than a strong local fit.
What I bring specifically: clinical depth (23 years), published frameworks, lived experience inside CNM/kink/queer communities, and a practitioner style that pulls from a deep toolbox rather than a single modality. If that style fits what you want, online is fine. If you want a coach you can sometimes see in person, that is a different choice and both are valid.
03I'm trans or non-binary. Are we likely to be a good fit?
Often, yes.
Many trans and non-binary clients work with me around relationships, non-monogamy, communication, sexuality, dating, self-trust, life transitions, and creating a life that feels more aligned with who they are.
You won't need to explain basic gender concepts, justify your identity, or spend our time educating me.
I'm affirming, but I'm not a specialist in medical transition, surgeries, transition-related advocacy, or gender assessment work. If those are the primary reasons you're seeking support, I'll gladly help point you toward practitioners whose expertise is centered in those areas.
If you're looking for coaching around relationships, intimacy, communication, non-monogamy, or personal growth, there's a good chance we'll work well together.
The first conversation is free.
Online consultation, up to 50 minutes. We talk about what you're working on, how I work, and find a rate that works for both of us.
Schedule a free coaching consult →